Expensive Czechoslovakian clam Karolína Kurková turned 29 on Thursday, February 28.
The 5-foot-11, 130 pound Kurková, born in the town of Děčín and currently residing in Gotham, earned enough “straight cash, homey” to be recognized as Forbes’ sixth wealthiest piece of eye-candy in 2007.
Like scrutinized sexpot Kate Upton, who is a breathing treatment for erectile dysfunction, only a jealous, homely muff, or an individual entirely repulsed by the female gender, would question Kurková’s ravishing beauty.
Removed from the limelight, the blond-haired, green-eyed Kurková, blessed with heavenly 34B pacifiers, has been pounded by rapper Pharrell Williams, record producer Damon Dash, model agent Alessandro Bazzoni and legendary boxer Wladimir Klitschko.
Thankfully, zero reports have surfaced that the 6-foot-6, 245 pound Klitschko irreparably damaged Kurková’s meat curtains.
Splitting with the above quartet, Kurková dated Archie Drury before marrying the uninspiring actor in 2009.
Although lacking a navel, Happy Birthday wishes are kindly sent to the mesmerizing Karolína Kurková!by