“The rehab journey continues,” wrote Rodriguez, 37, who underwent successful surgery on January 16 to repair a torn labrum, bone impingement and cyst in his left hip. “Ready to support the New York Yankees.”
Even if the three-time AL MVP, and immortal clown’s pocket, manages to recover, Rodriguez will likely be subjected to a 50-game suspension for purchasing human growth hormone and other performance-enhancing substances from an anti-aging clinic in Miami called Biogenesis.
Rodriguez, who acquired the bynames “A-Fraud” and “Bitch Tits” for rampantly abusing synthetic testosterone, will lose $7.65 million in salary after he’s formally pinched and temporarily barred from the sport.
“Bitch Tits,” a 10-time Silver Slugger Award winner and known adulterer who has amassed 647 homers, 2,901 hits and 1,950 RBI since debuting as a professional with the Seattle Mariners in July 1994, has visited the disabled list six times over the past six seasons and also had his right hip fixed in March 2009.
Rodriguez, a 14-time All-Star who put needles in his ass to become the youngest batter to ever crack 500 dingers, should be a man and retire to prevent further embarrassment on the diamond.
Unfortunately, Torrie Wilson’s banging companion lacks the morals and testicular fortitude to depart One East 161st Street in the Bronx with even a hint of grace.
Hence, “The rehab journey continues” for the most overrated ballplayer in the annals of America’s Pastime.by